My dad has cancer, and this is all I got...

It sucks. I can't tell if I am in denial or acceptance. There is noise and movement, but no continuity or order in chronology. There is lots of wine and anger and brief moments of tears. There are memories of  being a child and happiness and then making sushi two days before his surgery. There is valium and exhaustion, and hoping for a few moments of normality. Spell check isn't coming on, so I think that is a word. I feel like I have aged ten years. I felt like I have lost a lot. I feel like I have the best husband, the best sisters and brother and mothers in the world, and the best dad. There has been so much laughter, and so much silent horror. It's shitty, and it's beautiful, and I want to scream and punch and kick the shit out of cancer. I want to love everything to pieces and create beauty and laughter.
I am inebriated. I have a short train of thought.
End.

Gee Golly...

Good things a brewin'.

So much time has past since I have shared anything with the internet, and it's kinda hard to come back so sheepishly with not much to say. Just know that I have been a good girl. Doing yoga (not in a couple weeks, shame on me), cooking with and for friends and family. I have been making special gifts and getting goodies for other girls and boys. There is so much to be accomplished before Christmas! Maybe I will start sharing again. There is a lot to share.

Until then, here is what I look at daily, snuggled up with my little pup and my favorite man (besides my daddy and grandpa!)

Absence makes the heart grow fonder...

I suppose a lot of my absence has to do a lot with winter, in fact, winter is my nemesis. I love the snow, and the copious amounts of snuggling, but as it drags on I get depressed, I get anxious and in the end it makes me feel like shit all around. However, through the rain and hail storms I am beginning to feel the sun breaks working on me. I feel changes a comin'.

Saturday, one of my dearest pals is planning a brunch, with such edibles as quiche, cinnamon rolls, and coffee cake delegated to several lovely ladies. I didn't offer my services when we chatted about it Monday, I was feeling rather anti-social. As the week wore on I still felt like a little self-pitying piece of crap.. Until today. I decided to make homemade breakfast sausage patties, because A) I love sausage B) I love the shit out of breakfast sausage and C) I really have to stop feeling like a Grade A piece of garbage.

Here we go:


Breakfast Sausage That I Have Never Made But Will Taste On Saturday
adapted from Food Renegade


1 tbsp rubbed sage
2 tsp kosher salt
1 tsp coarse ground pepper
1/2 tsp marjoram

1/8 tsp crushed red pepper flakes
pinch ground cloves
1 1/2 tsp blackstrap molasses
2 lbs ground beef or pork (and use some non-crap meat, please, for your health)
*I used 1 lb beef, 1 lb pork


Mix those dried spices in a small cute bowl.
Put your meat in a large bowl, add your molasses and and spices. Combine. Massage your meat. Mix it all up.
And because I am a lazy shit, I am not going to write any more. I am going to cut and paste, and use quotations marks to signify that the words are not my own. Thank you and goodnight.




"3. Line a cookie sheet with foil or wax paper. Line up your individual patties on the paper so that they’re not touching. When the bottom layer is full, add an additional layer of wax paper or foil and keep adding patties. When all the patties are lying flat on the cookie sheet, put the cookie sheet in your freezer. When patties are fully frozen, remove from the cookie sheet and place in a large freezer bag to store for later use.
4. To cook, saute the frozen patties over medium heat for approximately 5 minutes per side. Enjoy!"

Note: A shot of Jagermeister is not necessary, but highly encouraged.

Cooked results to come!

skipper's first

Our Skip laid an egg after nearly being 11 months old. I thought she would never lay and we would have to eat her....

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I love the holidays.

Petite tree huggers. Stockings hung without much care. Vintage ornaments. Miniature people carrying trees. Pretty lights and tinsel garlands. Handmade wreaths. Pretty tree toppers. And lots more. Including Christmas beers.

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507 miles to go...

A long ride to San Francisco. The day has so far been a huge blur. Now it's dark, too early to sleep. A lit of hilarity had ensued already and many kids are cozy with their beers. The end.

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Little egg.

We got our first egg on Sunday! Such an exciting occasion. We had a lovely breakfast to celebrate, ate our first egg (double yolk!) and since then I have gotten an egg a day. I'm pretty sure both Beetlejuice and Gertrude are laying as the eggs are different colors, and found in different nesting areas. Gertrude can't seem to get her eggs in the same place while Beetlejuice lays hers in the back on the coop.

2nd, 3rd & 4th eggs, in order.

It's so lovely every morning to walk outside with and peek into the coop, hoping for just one egg. I love it.

Daydreams of simple things..

Well, to start, I suppose the beginning would not be so simple as it includes designing, drawing up plans, procuring the supplies, and then building.
I have the location, it's been in my family for 60 years, plenty of room on the farm for a little shack to house me and my man when we go there. There's room the woods, there is room by the apple trees, plenty of places to tuck the little cabin into.
I can't think of anything more exciting, to chance to reclaim where I grew up, to reconnect me to my home. Yeah, sure there is plenty of space in the house to sleep in (one bedroom), but why sleep in the house when you can have something like this...

The Hermit's Cabin

...all to yourself!

Imagine the snuggling that could be done! The reading of books, the drinking of tea and coffee, the quiet!
Walking up to your own little cabin to sleep by lamplight.. I must have one. All I have to do in convince my dad, and then spend a couple weekends building it. Whitewashed inside, a teeny stove, a chair, a bed, cute linens..
Simple things. That is what I want.

Chapter 3, it's still July.

And I have been eating.

Limes are a requirement.

So are sour cherry pies, slab pie.

And homemade pizza, delicious homemade pizza.

And lovely summer squash and ricotta galettes. 

Chapter Two, don't drown.

 SWIMMING HAPPENS IN THE SUMMER. Even if it is in Greenlake. It's clean, I swear.

Bob, you look funny.

This happened a lot of times, I think eight times in one month! Not enough, but in Seattle, you get what you get.